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Tina, the best way to succeed is not to overwhelm yourself and just start with one change. I would suggest really concentrating on being super diligent with the affection rule for starters. This simple thing will help tilt you in that direction of leader and make your praise and affection that much more powerful of a reward when he does well during the difficult situations.
For starters you do not need to change anything when you greet Rocky after being separated. Giving love will be mutual at that time. This is OK.
After, things have settled down following a greeting.. as hard as it may be do NOT give him affection when he is soliciting it. So this means do not pet him if he comes over and paws at you, puts his head on your lap, licks you, etc.. Do not tell him to do something and then pet him when he does this. Ignore him or walk away.
Then, when he is not soliciting it, randomly throughout the day call him sweetly to you and love him up if he comes. Just don’t do it for too long.. 10 seconds is about a good amount of time but not set in stone. The idea is to give him spurts of pure love throughout the day on YOUR call without over doing it. You want him to appreciate it and not take it for granted.
Do not follow him around to pet him or go to him when he is lying down and resting to pet him.. at least not yet. Be sure he wants it enough to come to you when you beckon him. This does not have to be a formal obedience command. You can simply pat your leg and say his name if you wish. You are only teaching him here that he has no power over you to make you do something for him, but you will PROVIDE this very important thing for him if we waits on your call. This will become a powerful reward over time. But, just like food if you overdo it he will not be hungry for it. Only you know Rocky best, so give him enough where he is happy and will come for it, but not so much he loses enthusiasm. Too little will make both of you sad 🙁
Try this for a couple of days strictly and let me know how it goes.
