Breed:
Rottweiler

Birth Date:
09/02/2019

Sex:
Female

About:
We got Stormy “on accident”. We were supposed to be out of town but came home early and a rescue that I had a relationship with had set “the runt of the litter” aside for me. We went to look at her mainly to be courteous, I wanted a Rottweiler and she was a Rottweiler-ish puppy ( her DNA tests came back 87% Rottweiler 12% Irish Setter). Well, we met her and that was that. She was my soul mate. We found out pretty quickly that she had major health health issues, she was pancreatic, and allergic to multiple proteins, had PICA and at only 6 months old X-Rays showed advanced dysplasia in her elbows. We learned so much about nutrition, vet care, and all the things. Her needs pushed me to look past conventional care to get answers. She was boisterous and loved to play with Rogue and some of my other client dogs. At about 1.5 years old she started vocalizing in pain during various movements.She was also having worsening false pregnancies with each heat cycle. We spayed her in August of 2021 and her body struggled with that recovery. We got through that and her vocalizations during movement got more frequent. We went around and around with various Dr’s and therapies and finally figured out that she had a few spinal issues. The main one being a bulging disc between l7 and s1 damaging the cauda equina nerve system. The outlook was paralysis at any moment, basically if she moved wrong she could lose function of her hind end. I always said I would never put an animal through a surgery that servere, let alone surgeries back to back, but she was so young and paralysis was looming. We did the surgery in February of 2022 to prevent paralysis. Her recovery was long and difficult. It is hard to see a young dog on 12 weeks of a combo of cage rest, light physical therapy, then rehabilitative exercise. She was coming out of her skin a lot because she had no appropriate outlet for her energy. After the recovery period my goal was to give her the best quality of life she could have. I was very clear that her life would be short and that it was my job to make sure that I was respecting what was best for her. Behaviorally she was very fear aggressive and generally nervous. I say all of that to say this: during all of these issues, Storm was mine and I was hers. We did everything together. She did everything I asked of her with a smile on her face and love in her heart. We adored each other. She was my first personal FSDT dog. Part of what was so special about her was that I got to have a different relationship with her than I did with any other animal. It was the first time that I felt enthusiastic love and devotion from a dog. I'm sure my previous dogs loved me as much as they could but the training got in the way. It was old school and certainly involved a level of fear that was “necessary for respect”. She was more a part of me than I think anything ever has been. When it became clear that her life would be always on edge, that her next burst of energy could be her last, that I would always be worried, I became very angry. I blamed myself for letting her play rough as a puppy, I second guessed every decision, I struggled to feel “good” around her. I spent some portion of every day crying in rage somewhere alone. They say when the student is ready the teacher will appear. I knew that I was not ok and that Stormy needed more. A friend of mine lovingly pointed out that the anger I felt was really a mix of fear, self pity, and disappointment that things weren’t going my way. She suggested that if I really loved Storm I needed to address those things or I would ultimately rob Storm of what she deserved, because love and affection cannot commingle with self centered fear and contempt…let alone self pity. I thought about all that Storm had been through, all the pain and frustrations and how she never complained. I thought about how she looked at me with loving and trusting eyes, even though I made so many mistakes. I thought about how she put herself between me and bad guys, even when she was terrified, she chose me over her fear. She chose me over her own safety. Surely, she deserved more than a mommy who was sitting in the victim seat. Surely she deserved to be chosen over my “self”. She made me willing to do the work that caused me to change in ways I don’t think I could have without her being exactly who she was. She required me to learn to accept the past, to compartmentalize and be accountable to my emotions, that my behavior is far more important than my feelings, she helped me to be grateful. She helped me step out in faith like I never have before. She was a catalyst for God’s grace to work in my life. God worked this all out so that I could have the “Therapy dog” I didn’t know I needed. Sophia and Rogue sent me looking for a better way to work with dogs, I found FSDT, then our vacation ended early, we got Storm and long story short: here I am a different person. When I think of her being gone I feel like a mentor is gone. I feel like my teacher is gone. I feel like someone I deeply admired and looked up to is gone. I try to talk about her like she is a “dog” so that I sound normal to other people…but she was really a spiritual experience. She was emotional growth, she was the practice of love in action. It is my prayer now that I don’t forget the lessons and that I honor her in my efforts moving forward. I have more work to do and I stand on her shoulders. This video won’t do her justice but it shows some of our favorite memories. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8GWTiA5RTOQ

Training Logs: